MY STORY

I was coming home from a sleepover in late 2013 when I had my first seizure. I hit my mouth on the center console of my mom's car, leaving a scrape on the upper area of my gums. Other than that, I have no recollection of what took place from then until waking up in the hospital an hour or two later, surrounded by my entire family. I was groggy, tired, and as opposed to everything swarming in my loved one's minds, knew that I needed to pee really badly. I was able to get to the bathroom, along with getting a PET scan of my brain.  

 

I came home as good as gold in the mid-afternoon of what happened to be Christmas Eve and a few weeks later, I was diagnosed with epilepsy. I was fourteen, about to graduate eighth grade, nervous to make the transition from middle to high school, and had no idea what epilepsy was up until that point. Although I had just received this life altering news, I was still more concerned about what I was going to wear to the upcoming eighth grade dance. This would become a trend throughout my teenage years, as I often did, and still do, focus on other aspects of my life instead of my epilepsy.

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I've had two other seizures aside from my first one, the second one being a few days after my eighth-grade graduation and the third about a week before Thanksgiving of 2016. Days before and after all three of my seizures, I lived 'normally', as any other teenager would. The weekend after my second seizure, I played in a day long volleyball tournament (which we won!). Even now, going on four years of being seizure free, I live my life not letting epilepsy define or control me. In high school, I made sure to go to every single high school dance, and now, I dance whenever I can, even if it's just alone in my room.

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I've come a long way since that fateful Christmas Eve in 2013, as someone with epilepsy, and as a human being. I've learned to not be ashamed of my extra ability (it's not a disability, c'mon now) and be more comfortable telling people I have epilepsy. Remember: the stigma surrounding individuals' 'problems' are not greater than informing people of what those problems are. Knowledge is always greater than ignorance. I’ve become more comfortable in my own skin and have learned to embrace and love who I am instead of becoming someone I am not, epilepsy and all. 

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The most important thing I've learned thus far in my journey with epilepsy is that everyone has something, whether that be depression, bulimia, or an unsafe and harmful home life. People are not the same in public as who they are behind closed doors, but that doesn't mean everything is as sunny as what they project into the world. However, people who reveal their 'something', shouldn't be pitied for it either. I used to be afraid people would do this to me if I told them I have epilepsy and I didn't want to be treated any differently because of it. It's been a long road, but I'm finally not ashamed of having epilepsy. The world is unpredictable, and you never know what will happen tomorrow – whether you get asked to a high school dance, you have a seizure, or you win a volleyball tournament. I'm living my life fully and seizing the moment.

 

My name is Annie Breger, and I have epilepsy.